Because of you

I am uncertain whether I should feel joy or feel saddened by the thought of you.

As I sit by the ocean listening to the roar of the waves I think of you.

My fingers become cold from the chill of the air and I think of you.

I stare at the sky and it only reminds me of you.

I look further beyond the ocean to stare at the mountains layered with fog

Then I start to feel my eyes welling up with tears,

because I am thinking of you.

This part of the year will forever be a bittersweet time for me,

because of you.

I wish to hear your voice and see your smile

But since I have lost that privilege I hope you are well

And I want you to know I will always love you


Don’t Be A Fool

Todays a brained new day and you would be a fool not to take advantage of it. 

Make today the day you try something new or you do something that you’ve been putting off.

It’s so easy to set aside ideas and plans when you think that they’re not that important.

What happens when a year has passed and you still haven’t started that project. What’s your next move? Do you think about it some more and never act or are you choosing to take action and conquer those fears, doubts, or even just shaking that devilish laziness that we all have. Don’t cheat yourself and waste another day.

Don’t let today be another one of those days you say, “Ehh it can wait.” 

There’s  no such thing as a better time then now. 

Don’t be a fool

Take action

Shame on me

Awe man, it’s been a few months since I have written…. shame on me

Sorry, I have been extremely busy working and sitting on the boarder line of being unbearably bored. I blame the rain. I was told we’ve had at LEAST 90 inches of rain this winter. 90 freaken inches man! To say the least being inside was feeling more like prison than enjoyable. I had a few subjects I was interested in writing about but the longer I waited to get on here the interest faded away. Again shame on me…

And don’t take me as a boring person, I did stuff. But sometimes I’d rather be outside running around like a wild animal than in the zoo.

So anyways, the weather is coming around after 2 months of begging it to stop raining and just give us some damn vitamin D. Now everyone can shut up about the weather being so crappy and mow their lawns. Which is all you could hear the first day it was sunny with a slight chance of clouds. To say the least everyone’s lawns are looking damn good.

Even though I binge watched quite a few shows I also worked out pretty damn hard, cleaned up my diet, finished a good ass book, and my freaken Thyroid is making it’s way back to normal. Hell to the M.F. YES! If you don’t know what M.F. stand for just make something up, I’m sure it’s not to far from what I’m saying.

I’m pretty stoked about my Thyroid though I didn’t know how much it was affecting me till now. I feel so much more balanced out. Less moody, more energy and just happier overall. It probably has to do with a cleaner diet too but you know what it played a big roll in wanting to take care of my body even more so. It’s less of a struggle to want to consume more veggies than cake. I don’t crave sweet as much now and my heart doesn’t feel like it’s going to explode. I guess I should have take care of this 2 years ago…. shame on me?

Alright I think I’m done spilling what’s on my walnut brain. So I guess I’m going to try to do something on the sunny but awfully windy day.

Peace out!

Ambience In Nature

via Photo Challenge: Ambience

A scenery that really sets an ambience for me is when I’m out taking pictures of the sunset with my best friend. We usually go to the beach to capture the dancing colors in the sky but I provide two of my favorite sunset photos that particularly give off a radiant beauty that makes me feel at ease every time I look at them.

The top photo is when we stayed at a fire lookout during the summer of 2016. This is the night we arrived. It was a breathe taking view of the mountain tops, the dips, the spaces in-between the mountains and beyond. It was an experience I will never forget and this photo of my best friends silhouette with the soft colors in the sky will forever take me back to this wonderful moment in my life.

This second photo is one of the latest times myself and Spencer(silhouette above) went to take photos of the sunset. I will admit I don’t take the most outstanding sunset pictures but compared to my late photos this is an improvement. The colors just make me feel so warm inside and I can’t help but smile. The sound of the ocean adds that much more to the ambience. It’s so easy to relax with this combination. I hope you enjoy!


Holy Moly where did 2016 go?!

Well since 2017 is literally around the corner, let’s talk about new years resolutions and ACTUALLY accomplishing them.

Lets face the facts, we all make new year resolutions and for most of us we don’t go through with them. But why? Because we’re freakin lazy human beings that’s why. So it’s time to say farewell to 2016 and make a change this year. If you set goals for the new year hold them against yourself and just freaken do it. Like Nike!  There’s no reason in this Universe why we shouldn’t! So here are the words you should be saying, “Okay 2016 wasn’t my year, or 2016 I accomplished so much, but I shall make this year even better. I will set goals and follow through with them. I will not cheat myself and be a lazy human being. Here I come 2017 I’m all hyped on Mountain Dew and I’m gonna jump on you like a spider monkey!” If you don’t get that last part it’s from Talladega Nights staring Will Ferrell and John Reilly. Hilarious movie! Okay anywaaays, I know it’s one thing to say it but it’s a hell of a lot more to actually take action and challenge thyself. You deserve to be even more amazing than you were before and trust me you’ll be thanking yourself. Accomplishing something feel’s incredible! And this year I’m going to put myself to the test and freakin accomplish all my goals or freakin die trying! Not really, that was a little dramatic. But here are a few of my goals for this year…

~I will practice yoga on a daily basis and it will become a part of my routine (already on day 20 on my 30 day challenge and I feel great!)

~I will enjoy life and adopt a positive attitude no matter how rough it might be

~I will learn something new physically and mentally

~I will try to visit a new place at least a couple times this year

~I wont use “I have nothing to do” as an excuse. There’s always something to do

~I will be wise with my money so I can save most of it to travel

I think that’s more than enough to list. I do have little goals and more long term goals but I’m sure you guys don’t care that much haha. So I challenge you to write down your goals and gosh dang it accomplish them! Like I said before there’s no reason you shouldn’t.  NO EXCUSES! Life’s seriously too short for that nonsense. So go, right now or I mean after you’re done reading this, go write down your goals and laminate the paper. Post it on your bathroom mirror or somewhere you’ll see it everyday. Do it! Do it! Do it! Alright I’m done now….go to it though, seriously.

~Stay awesome or get awesome and don’t forget everything happens for a reason!~

Remembering Everything Happens for a Reason

Arighty, you guys might recognize the title and that’s because I added that little quote at the end of “Trying Something New”.

I wanted to share with you guys my belief in these five simple yet powerful words. I truly believe with all the fiber in 5′ 2″ body  that everything happens for a reason. No matter what you do there will be obstacles and of course you will have your triumphs. You can try all you want to make something as perfect as possible, but sometimes things just don’t turn out how you planed it. I know that happens for me quite a bit, I’m sure there are others out there that are in the same boat. I mean don’t get me wrong it might be frustrating sometimes but it’s still an awesome boat to be in! I say that because if you have the mindset that everything will be okay and you just have a positive outlook, everything will truly be okay.

The most recent thing that I would say wasn’t meant to be is when my lovely boyfriend and I took a trip up to the mountains to hike the Buck Lake trail. We originally planned to hike it during the summer but ya know it didn’t work out. So the opportunity came and we decided to go for it. The only thing we weren’t expecting was that the road, the further we drove up, was covered in snow. It wasn’t the soft fluffy welcoming snow either it was the daunting icy snow, and if you don’t know what it’s like driving on icy snow it can be a recipe for disaster. Especially if you don’t have the right vehicle. Apparently we didn’t, but we didn’t know that until it was almost to late..

We drove up nice and easy for the first couple of miles seeing a tiny bit of snow on the side. Still not knowing what was waiting for us just moments away. This road is quite narrow, wrapping around the mountain side, and in some areas only wide enough to fit a single car. Thankfully we didn’t run into anyone on their way down. We did see a small gray Toyota truck pulled off to the side but we didn’t think anything of it and just kept on chugging along. We then see a good amount of snow/ ice blanketing a pull out so we decided to stopped and check it out. The instant I stepped out there was this cool air that rushed to hug my body. I shivered then walked around the Jimmy to find myself almost slipping on the ice that covered the edge of the mountain. I take a deep refreshingly cold breathe in through my nose and then exhale. What a site… thick fog almost swallowing the mountains. Just able to see the peaks covered in snow and the trees closest to us. Just beautiful..

We instantly whipped  out our cameras and started snapping pictures. You could hear nothing but the clicks of our cameras. Soon after we were heading back up the mountain. More and more snow started to blanket the road. It was still unforeseen how much snow there was actually going to be. Everything seemed like it was going good until all of the sudden the Jimmy started to slide…Spencer tries to correct the car but we just slip closer and closer to the edge. Just inches away from tumbling down the mountain side he stopped the car and we sit for a second. We look at each other both knowing this is not a good situation to be in.

Fear dripped down my body as I opened the passenger door. There was sheer ice underneath all four tires. Spencer walked up the road just a couple feet more saying there’s probably no way we’ll make it. I stayed clear from the car as he tried to drive up and away from the edge. We lost another inch or so.. as deft and prepared as my love is he took a small army green shovel out from the back of the Jimmy and pierced the snow digging down to the dirt. Ah-Ha traction! It seemed like it would have helped, but no give. The right back wheel just kept spinning while spiting out the rocky dirt. I see frustration upon Spencer’s face but he kept a cool demeanor. He tried the 4 wheel drive but he soon found out that it didn’t work. He finally pulled out the chains knowing or hoping they would work. I’ve never had the opportunity to put chains on nor have I even seen them before, but they just seemed too loose. The frustration grew as the chains slipped off. What in the world were we going to do…

Just when we thought this couldn’t get any worse a white Ford truck came driving up. They stopped about 15 feet away from us so spencer walked down to talk with them for a minute. I stayed near the Jimmy just waiting for him to come back. He finally did and then I look over to see them backing up. Not to far from where we were there was a decent size pull out so I assumed that’s where they stopped. Then Spencer says to me, “I didn’t want to have to do this but we’re going to have to back out, that’s out last resort.” I took a deep breathe shaking my head. He hopped back in the car and I backed away. “Here we go I thought to myself,” saying a little payer. I helped guide him back away from the edge then a flood of relief poured over me. He backed up some so I ran to catch up and then slipped back into the car. Thank goodness we made it out of the situation, but I thought that’s where our adventure ended. We backed our way down to the pull out meeting with the other couple. Spencer goes to talk with him once more and tells me they were going to give it a try. We waited 10 minutes to give them time just incase they had to back down. Then back up the mountain we went.

We drove up to the spot we got stuck and held our breath.. we made it passed that time. Not too far ahead we saw the Ford pulled over so we pulled up next to them. They told us its too risky. There was ice covering the road. They said they were going to turn around and head back. So we stopped the Jimmy to check it out. The further we walked up the less of the road we could see. We then decided our trip to Buck Lake was cancelled but we could hike up to Bear Basin Butte fire lookout from where we were. We found a spot to park, leaving enough room for any brave soul to pass. We put our coats on then our packs and up we went!

We didn’t walk too far before we heard a big truck making it’s way up. We stopped and moved to the side waiting for the truck to pass, but then, with the lack of luck we were having, Spencer knew two of the people. They were heading to the top to find Christmas trees. What were the odds? So we hopped in the bed of the truck and continued our way up. We thanked them and from there we walked the rest of the way to the lookout. Our walk was close to a mile but the snow was about a foot deep so made it feel 2 times longer. Up and up we went. Till finally we got a glimpse of the lookout. Hurray! It was just so amazing seeing everything covered in snow. It surely seemed different compared to when we stayed there during the summer. When it was warm and you could see the plants and gravel. But it had it’s own beauty.

We first enjoyed our lunches on a bench that was completely buried in snow. We did clear it off before sitting, we weren’t up for soaked and cold butts. After we filled our bellies we went crazy taking pictures of everything we could. I wish I could have shared more photos with you guys but I am only able to add one photo. So sorry about that!

From there we made our way down after about 1-2 hours of capturing and enjoying the stunning nature that laid out in front of us. Back at the opening the friends of Spencer were still there dragging the trees to the truck just as soon as we were coming down. They had one dilemma, the rear right tires internal liner was protruding out a quarter size tear. As selfless as Spencer is he agreed to help them. So as they packed their trees we started walking down to the Jimmy. Maybe a half mile into our walk they passed us up. Soon after we made it back to the car. So we drove down to meet them at a spot where there was no snow and fairly flat. And so the tire changing began… As I stood observing Spencer and his friend change the tire I was being attacked by this ladies son that accompanied the couple. He was a character with endless energy. He would act like a dinosaur then just stop to stare straight up at me. As soon as I thought he was done picking on me he came up and spanked me then he would spank Spencer, and then back to me so I playfully spanked him back and his mom yelled out, “You gotta spank him harder!” He kept the mood light and energized.

2 hours later or at least it felt that way. It only grew colder as the sun disappeared. It was dark and intensely cold when they finished up. We all hurried to say our goodbyes and were on our way back down the mountain side.

Okay, so the moral of the story is that sometimes you have to go with the flow. For us we weren’t expecting that much snow or any snow at all and that’s where everything happens for a reason comes in. If we didn’t slip where we did we would have kept on driving, and who knows, we could have gotten in an even worse situation with how much ice there was further up. I’m thankful that we made it out of there and that we actually were able to enjoy our day despite everything that happened. 

There are many other situations I have been in thinking it just wasn’t meant to be. Or thank goodness that happened to prevent me from going there. Whatever it is, sometimes the best and only thing you can do is take a deep breathe, smile and say to yourself everything happens for a reason. Just think for one second about everything you have done in your past or things that have happened to you, all those series of events have lead you up to the point where you are now. Whether you are in a pickle at this exact moment or you feel you have everything figured out without your past trials, tribulations, victories, whatever you want to call them, you wouldn’t be this amazing person or amazing person in progress that you are today.

P.S. I read books quite a bit but I don’t credit myself on being a good writer. I just wanted to give you guys as much detail as I could so that way you could kind of feel how we felt or imagine where we were. I hope I was successful in that. I don’t know if stories will be my thing. But I enjoyed writing it and remembering exactly what happened. You guys are awesome and remember.. everything happens for a reason!(: